Float Dissolve

I was thinking the other night, after I had killed a mosquito that was trying to find just the right spot to take my blood, about the notion of cutting off your hand to feed a starving animal. Being of benefit to all sentient beings includes mosquitoes. I think I can swallow that easier than cutting my hand off, so it’s a start.

I was also thinking at work about the notion of everyone having been my mother. This also means that I myself have been everyone’s mother. That’s a lot of lifetimes.

I’m beginning to feel very fortunate that I am alive. That I am human and when I really look at it, I have things very well.

Also, note to self, I cannot take refuge in cookies.

Today I was the lone photographer for four hours. It went very fast and I was quite tired. My supervisor was a man named Stuart. A really great guy from what I gathered. It stayed overcast for the whole shoot so I didn’t have to change settings or move the angle of the camera. That was pretty nice. After I had talked a bit about my situation and my transient position (wait wait, all of life is transient…) of deciding what to concentrate on he replied with said title. I certainly didn’t expect to hear that. It was surprising. I certainly don’t feel that way. Very nice.

I just noticed a weevil crawling up the wall. He just fell. I picked him up and let him outside. He gave a wonderful performance of being dead. He should have more luck finding sustenance out there. Crawling around the carpet and walls probably isn’t very rewarding.

Before work I went here

I just tried the past-life diagnosis:

Your past life diagnosis: I don’t know how you feel about it, but you were female in your last earthly incarnation.
You were born somewhere in the territory of modern USA South-Center around the year 1450.
Your profession was that of a chemist, alchemist or poison manufacturer.Your brief psychological profile in your past life:
You always liked to travel and to investigate. You could have been a detective or a spy.The lesson that your last past life brought to your present incarnation:
You should develop self-love and ability to implant hope into hearts of people. Ambition is not everything. True wealth is buried in your soul. Do you remember now?

An electronic fourtune cookie. Indeed. Considering everyone with my birthday receives this. Nonetheless, fun.

So I entered the restaurant with the four noble truths and the eightfold path swimming through my head. I had a very healthy state of mind going in there. I had a very nice moment towards the end of the shift just standing watching all of this autonomous activity of beings flashing around me. I caught a glimpse of the observer but once I start moving forward to the observer of the observer it falls apart. On the way home I saw three groups of people. A few kids skateboarding; a group of kids playing football; and a small groupd of four girls and a guy. I thought about what brought them together. I thought about what brought all of us together in that very moment. I felt very connected to all of them. Also the people through the window in Shoppers. This moved me to envision the atoms constructing us all and the space in between them. I began to feel that lightness, even for a second.

While at work I told the Kitchen Manager I was happy to be alive. No sarcasm. He said that’s wonderful. “It’s so nice to have Derek back on the line. He doesn’t complain about this and that (melts into mocking the rest of the line)”. Then later after two “hits”, he asked antagonistically, “Still happy to be alive?”. Of course I was.

I tried to remember to rejoice in the ripening of the animals’ karma, albeit while I myself am planting seeds of bad karma. And yet, eating this food might bring a smile to the person eating it. I’m not sure about the situation.

I just ate a banana.

I’m curious what David Blaine is up to these days.

I can almost do a decent Cobra Cut.

Beautiful weather today.