Float Dissolve

It is winter now and it is cold. Also I have a little cold.

Cute little rhinovirus.

Robert was very kind and let me borrow The Art of Happiness.

Found some really amazing artists yesterday. Links to follow. That is all.

A ton of really great work is to be found here. The graffitti is pretty exceptional.

(Infected by Drawn!)

Haven’t posted too much recently as I am working on populating my new Deviant Art account. I’ve known about this site for a few years but never signed up for an unknown reason.

There are some brilliant artists showing their work there. Easy to spend hours digging.

I just watched an entire clip of pornography and was not aroused at all.

I believe this is the first time this has ever happened to me. I am 24 years old and have been watching pornography for 12 years. Haha.

I watched a ‘reality’ porn clip. I think what kept me from endulging in the voyeuristic qualities was how our main character picked up the woman. He went into Barnes and Noble and found a random person reading a book on sex techniques. In the background was Nat King Cole, the absolute epitome of Christmas singers. I don’t think anybody has or ever will create Christmas music as beautiful as he. I think the overall setting of the clip made me step out of my reptilian brain that seems to have complete control over my sexual urges. It’s like at that point my cortex took over and I simply watched this video of two strangers engaging in what I feel should be an exclusive intimate encounter.

Something about it being Christmas time made me think of the two of them going home and celebrating Christmas with their families. We all know sex sounds great by all means during the action but if something doesn’t feel right, it feels terrible afterwards. It seems like the reptilian brain exhibits complete control of our actions and for some reason it seems like the only possible thing we could be doing at the moment. Then, once that energy is released we’re left to do what humans are so adept at doing: replaying what we had done over and over again.

Then we start thinking about the consequences of our actions. And for a woman, whose chemicals are supposedly more suited for emotions I can only imagine she felt terrible afterwards.

Society makes us believe that cuddling is only for women. Of course this is complete bullshit.

Every single one of us want to be comforted. Especially after the most vulnerable we can be: naked, emotionally and physically exposed, inserting or having someone insert a part of their body into someone else’s .

The sole purpose of sex is reproduction of the species. It’s so amazing that after generations of animals, humans have extracted the purely sensual aspect of said encounter. Just like juicing fruit. Or killing buffalo and only taking their skin and tongue. Or basing our liking of someone’s singing simply on how they sing, not what they’re singing.

We have been extracting only one part of the whole spectrum of experience and putting so much value into it.

Haha. Haha. True value is in the whole. The entire field of everything felt.

Pain, pleasure, excitement, depression, and on and on.

I’m so happy to be alive and human so I can contemplate these things.

I love you Wendi.